Month: January 2025

The Movie Report: January Update

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We’re at that odd time of the year where I’m burnt out from the horror movie and year-end seasons, movies I mean to see before awards parades I’m either not in the mood for or they haven’t been widely released yet, and I keep thinking “I should watch this old movie and have an existential crisis about how old I am” to knock some supposed classics and best-ofs off my queue. It’s probably a clue that I should actually knock out a book or do some creative things. Alas, the hurty head times are always lurking in the shadows demanding 2 hours of stillness, so here we are again.

Heretic
At first I thought it seemed a bit cruel that this featured two mormon ladies. Like, y0, we’re picking at the bottom of the barrel of society here. But, if it were two missionary boys, the movie would have ended when Hugh Grant held up an old Playboy and excitedly asked “who likes dinosaurs!!” Repressed Brother Smith had prayed for this day for years! Anyway, reminded me of a cross between Nefarious, Barbarian, and Men. Fine but not fantastic.

Red Rooms
True crime courtroom Batman. Interesting enough but best worked for me in context of cleansing me of lingering negativity towards emotionally intense French movies and/or Canada.

Things Will Be Different
RIYL low budget time travel movies. In this one the characters are already aware of the time travel, so, that’s new. Did not like the filming style. The ending felt off and made me feel like I missed something, which is altogether possible.

Anora
While not the same tone or level of violence, RIYL Tarantino movies. Absolutely do not watch this with stuffy or emotionally immature people. I feel like anything else I say would be a spoiler, but the synopsis of a sex worker meeting a rich guy whose parents aren’t about that shit is accurate. I’m curious to see how the Oscars treat this movie given its content. Otherwise, a very decent movie and caused me to tweak my early end-of-year list.

The Texas Chain Saw Massacre 1974
Well shit. Now I see all of the references in those Rob Zombie movies. Excellent set dec. Definitely in the “WTF” camp. Better than I thought it was going to be. But I’m still not much of a fan of slashers. Teenage me probably would have liked it more but I have since grown empathy and tired ears. (When they pulled up to the gas station, I swear the guy was going to scream “Pancakes!”)

Nightbitch
Mild horror drama about motherhood being a burden. If you’ve ever had to take care of a person, young or old, for an extended period of time alone, you’ll perfectly understand it. I lol’ed when she talked to the cat. The rating it has is fair considering who tends to rate movies. Meanwhile, I had CSS’s “Art Bitch” stuck in my head the whole time. Almost relevant!

Rumours
This was my punishment for not checking ratings for movies before watching them and believing the cast alone would make for a good watch. Maybe going in blind on movies is not the best policy. Either way, didn’t care for it. This was my first movie seen of 2025.

Turning Red
The talk about this movie 2-3 years ago led me to believe it was going to be about periods. It was actually just a general coming-of-age movie focused on a do-good teen girl learning to live in her own shoes and her family’s matriarchal culture. Decent, easy watch but I’m glad I unintentionally didn’t watch it when it came out because of the parent relationship here.

The Red Shoes 1948
Even 77 years of society and film later, this felt relevant. Men be menning. The long ballet scene was worth the watch.

Dressed To Kill
Pretty transphobic in the way Silence of the Lambs is but worth it for the lols brought on by the “what’s in this drawer?” scene and the lady sitting behind the son scene. Much nudity. Much horrible acting by the second lead woman (apparently she nearly won a Razzie). For 1980, it tried.

Double Blind
I stopped it halfway and forgot I was watching it, and when I finally picked it back up days later it didn’t make much of a dent. It’s not bad, but ultimately it came across as a middle-of-the-road mild horror. It might have been better as a TV episode than a movie.

Jaws
Well, I finally watched the whole thing. I’ve of course seen it in tiny pieces in culture, and one scene reminded me that I rode whichever Universal Studios ride that had a Jaws part in it, but whether I saw it as a young kid is uncertain anymore. It felt new… and it felt like 1975. The vet was an interesting character, the main dudes generally felt well-rounded, and the shark had a decent amount of realism even for 2025 standards (let’s be real, special effects peaked in the 80s before digital-everything took over and this movie contributed to that peak). But, brutal death aside, the sense of danger in movies in the 70s doesn’t compare to later iterations. But I saw it, finally.

Sunshine
This title doesn’t lead to remembering it well vs dozens of other space movies. I accidentally started watching Serenity first before I clued in that it was overly SyFy and I should check to make sure it wasn’t a TV movie and I was spoiling some TV show for myself. Indeed. Ok then, another day for that one. Anyway, in 2007 this would have made a dent, but today it mostly caused a strange feeling of realizing things that happened in 2007 now feel dated. It’s not committing any major temporal atrocities, but the small things added up and reminded me that 2007 was 18 years ago and omfg. What the fuck. Why? As for the movie itself, it’s about an earth-saving mission to the sun and a crew with evident brain damage with writing featuring plot holes and direction that reminded me of American Horror Story at times. It’s not terrible, if you like sci-fi with typical human idiots in it you’ll like it, and it had at least one interesting idea, but I checked out by the last third of the movie.

A Real Pain
Given the characters, this felt akin to a comfort movie for people with depression. It kind of just ‘was’.

Nosferatu
Talk about stylish. There are definitely similarities to The Witch, etc, which are hard to ignore. But this movie was the mopey romantic-era goth side of pretty. Kid me would have ate this movie up. I’ve never seen the 1920s original movie despite repeatedly planning to, so I have nothing to directly compare it to in terms of style or story, but as a standalone entity, nice job. Loved the shadow over the city scene. Thought of the movie Legend at least once, as well as The Keep, Fright Night, and Possession, and (of course) Night on Bald Mountain. I am definitely going to see this a second time. Will this hark the return of creepy vampires?

I’m presently planning to type here a bit more often as the social media landscape that I’ve been attached to most the last 15 years has grown stale at best. I’m very much not a fan of policy changes that discount LGBTQIA+ people or allow space to treat non-straight relationships as lesser. The inauguration and the subsequent corporate bootlicking that’s followed despite the president clearly associating with a nazi now fueled to the point of no longer hiding it has really put me off on associating with anyone or anything that’s complacent to this. We can deal with a bit of discomfort and inconvenience in divorcing ourselves from these entities and do better.

Astro Analysis of David Lynch

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I figured why not burn myself out and make my hand hurt. David Lynch astrology time!

Ascendant Scorpio. Mars in Cancer in 8th conjunct Saturn. Well well well if we don’t already have clarity. No wonder someone told me I wrote like David Lynch once – I, too, am a fellow 8th houser with a bullshit Mars condition. Anyway, this is someone who leans towards privacy or breaking down social rules or depth. Mars conjunct Saturn is someone who needs to work/keep busy. Saturn rules the 3rd house (only) and he needs to work via communication, telling stories, movement, self education. Does he has some thing regarding vehicles/transportation? And I immediately think of the titles Mulholland Drive, Lost Highway. Cancer isn’t overtly masculine (obviously not astrologically) but there’s a sense of the thing there, of martial, sexual, fire BAD topics. Mars+Saturn here is like “here’s my fucking baby, I just fucking cut it out of me with a pair of fucking nail scissors, it took all fucking day, fuck you”.

Midheaven Virgo, Mercury in Capricorn in the 2nd. This is a more grounded vibe. Once again communication has come up, writing, thinking, sensing the environment, textures, looking at and scrutinizing small details, thinkin’ ’bout stuff (literal stuff). Minimalism comes to mind. Maybe owning things that are very old. Collections of old medical books? I’m theorizing lately that maybe 2nd house types have a thing for 3D art, art history, clothing in the sense of texture more than visual fashion, and finding personal value in creating or hoarding physical value.

Moon conjunct Midheaven. Known for being known. A need to be known/seen. Why u no talking about me.

Sun conjunct Venus in 3rd. Again, communication, probably pretty floral. I see Pluto has been conjunct his Sun in the past year or three. Harder to communicate, walk, drive in recent times. Very interesting that my mom had Pluto conjunct Sun when she lost the ability to talk and walk and it all turned into just fucking yelling, even though her Sun is in a completely different area of her chart.

This is pretty surface level, but it’s obvious enough that this person was going to be known via some sort of communication activity. I would have thought writer if I just saw this chart without knowing who it was but the 2nd house influence here and Ascendant ruler in 8th suggests more tactile than just ideas.

When I think director of movies my first thought is Neptune. He has that in Libra in 11th making a super wide square with Mercury. It’s a 7 degree orb, I wouldn’t normally look at it. I think it’s more likely he’s gone through some Neptune transits, annnd yes duh, but let’s look at some movie dates.

1977.03.19 Eraserhead
Pluto had been conjunct his Neptune in about 1975 and was now approaching square his Mercury (ruler of his Midheaven). He had an eclipse conjunct his Neptune around here somewhere (the exact one was Oct 2, 1978). I’ve never seen Eraserhead to assess its relevance but TLDR he got tapped into the social vibes y0. I understand the movie is fucky and that would follow with Neptune+Pluto. Sounds like it took forever to get made and properly released so there’s probably a lot more accurate astrology to look at here but I don’t have those dates in front of me.

1980.10.10 Elephant Man
That date is for the full US release. Jupiter trine Sun/Venus from the 10th (Jupiter in 10th = good for career recognition). Saturn had just trined Sun. Uranus was conjunct his Ascendant about a year before. Pluto was about to conjunct his Jupiter.

1986.09.19 Blue Velvet
At this point he had a career going and me looking at years out of context mean I’m staring into a void of who knows. Neptune sextile Midheaven/Moon all that year. Saturn square Midheaven/Moon from 1st house, exact both that month and had been exact both in later 1985. Jupiter sextile Mercury from 4th. Mars due to be conjunct Sun in the following week or two and had been retrograde that year where it passed over his Mercury. Guessing early promotion for the film was a lot of back and forth movement, travel, changes in plans, paperwork. The thing that stands out the most to me is Saturn in 1st square his Midheaven/Moon. It’s a turning point in career time and a restriction of emotion to focus on work at expense to self while simultaneously being viewed as someone who has their shit together.

2001.10.12 Mulholland Drive
Jupiter is opposite his Mercury, lol, and Mars conjunct his Mercury that week, also lol. Apparently the movie had already gotten praise in May 2001… with Saturn square his Midheaven and Moon from his 7th. Literally the opposite of Blue Velvet. Fantastic. Love you astrology.

I’m about to burn out so I’m stopping there for now.

I just noticed Venus rules his 7th, though… Did he ever work directly with his partners? Yes. He was with Isabella Rossellini, she worked on Wild at Heart and Blue Velvet. Mary Sweeney worked with him also. His last wife was also an actress in his stuff (yikes that age gap). I thought of this specifically because of Venus conjunct his Sun, and Sun doesn’t rule a house in the Placidus chart, so it needed a way to express through aspects. Venus opposite Mars (his Ascendant ruler) in his chart, too, so working with a partner or a collaborator would be his M.O. Might be a bit parasitical, but men be menning.

Anyway, that was fun and now I need to zone out for the next 10 hours to recover from this.

SOURCES:
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/David_Lynch
https://www.astro.com/astro-databank/Lynch,_David

Oscars tarot predictions

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Eh, what the hell. Let’s ask tarot to describe the movies that win awards at the Oscars once again. Nominations haven’t even been listed out yet, but we’ll see if I can narrow it down with just three cards. Probably not since I haven’t seen too many Oscar-level movies yet, but, hey, learnin’.

The overall question is “describe the plot of the movie that wins” or “describe the role of the actor who wins”.

[Updated 3/2 with who won.]

Who hosts?
5 of Wands, Fool, 3 of Cups
My theory before I checked because I forgot it had already been announced: A comedian. 3 of Cups is a lighter/fun energy despite the 5 of Wands, Fool could be like a jester to be overly literal or someone who takes leaps/chances. It’s Conan.

Best Picture
6 of Pentacles, Knight of Swords, 5 of Swords
My theory: Anora. 6 of Pentacles has sexual/power exchange vibes, the rest of the movie is a lot of conflict. I haven’t seen too many movies theorized to be nominated but this feels on the money. Would a movie like this still win, though?
WHO WON: Anora.

Best Director
Page of Swords, 4 of Pentacles, Queen of Cups
My theory: I’m not sure. I’m trying to describe the movie here and I’m not sure if I’ve seen it to be able to describe it in tarot. Queen of Cups makes me think women. Page of Swords chaos or communication. 4 of Pentacles is a reserved, stingy, closed energy.
WHO WON: Anora.

Lead Actor
Ace of Swords, Knight of Swords, Knight of Pentacles
My theory: My mind immediately went to Adrian Brody because of the Knight of Pentacles. This is trying to describe the role, and I haven’t seen The Brutalist, but if it’s about a gradual journey of self-defense in the name of truth/clarity… My other thought was Sing Sing/Colman Domingo for that description.
WHO WON: Adrian Brody.

Lead Actress
8 of Wands, Knight of Pentacles, 2 of Swords
My theory: Demi Moore?! That so well describes her role, excluding the ego element. Taking a blind eye or being split between two difficult choices, to a background of passionate, firey movement vs being still.
WHO WON: Mikey Madison/Anora. The cards still work for her role in that movie.

I feel like that’s mostly enough, but this year I asked about a few other things for fun.

Original Screenplay
Wheel, Page of Cups, 9 of Wands
Theory: 9 of Wands immediately makes me think of someone injured, and A Real Pain may be nominated, sooo. I’m not sure what to think of Wheel vs the movies I can think of.
WHO WON: Anora. These cards confuse me, but she is, indeed, injured and stalled in that movie, and she comes into fortune.

Animated Feature
Page of Pentacles, 9 of Pentacles, Ace of Pentacles
Theory: The Wild Robot? I had to break this down since I haven’t seen any animated movies recently. Page of Pentacles suggests kids or learning/growing up. Ace of Pentacles would be a new venture and doubling down on that energy of a novel next step towards growth. 9 of Pentacles has an independent feeling, standing apart, and there’s a bird on the card. There’s a bird in a few of the animated movies this past year but Wild Robot features one. You look at my fuckin’ bird!
WHO WON: Flow. There’s a bird (several) in Flow, too. And we looked at that fuckin’ bird.

Sound
Hermit, 5 of Cups, Lovers
Theory: Uhhh. Introverted seeking and losses in regards to choices made or partners had. I didn’t see Challengers in the theories lists, so maybe it’s Wicked? Evidently folks got a lot of 5 of Cups energy out of it.
WHO WON: Dune 2.

Costume Design
3 of Cups, 2 of Pentacles, 4 of Pentacles
Theory: Wicked? 3 of Cups is a bunch of women/witches dancing.
WHO WON: Wicked.

That was all I was going to do, but let’s pull cards for supporting actors as well. Might as well test the shit out of myself while I’m here.

Supporting Actor
Justice, World, Knight of Swords
Theory: Sounds cerebral. World could be travel and several movies feature it.
WHO WON: Kieran Culkin for A Real Pain. My description made me laugh. It’s literally about traveling and features a couple of hyper-cerebral guys.

Supporting Actress
Sun, Page of Cups, 9 of Wands
Theory: Something positive, joyful, youthful, or musical that hits a snag or injury. My mind goes back to The Substance but, well, horror. So one of the musicals is probably next best choice.
WHO WON: Zoe Saldaña for Emilia Perez. Well, it’s a musical.

Documentary Feature
Temperance, Moon, Hierophant
Theory: I haven’t seen any of these to be able to make a remotely accurate guess. But, waiting…secrets…religion. Sussing out problems in the darkness within an institution and trying to find balance. Black Box Diaries, No Other Land, and Union seem to qualify. Those three specific cards sound like Union’s synopsis to me but I haven’t seen it to know for sure.
WHO WON: No Other Land.

We’ll see where we are with the nominations on the 17th when they’re announced and maybe I can narrow it down a bit from there.

Update 3/2: Well, I got a lot of these. Three cards is difficult to narrow down full context, but it seems I’m getting better at this, and even got movies/roles I hadn’t seen yet. Bummed that The Substance got the usual horror treatment and “only” won for makeup/hair, but Anora was a fine movie worth the now-hype, and good for them.