Month: August 2023

The Martian Chronicles

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The book hoarding of recent years hasn’t come to much. Empty moments lead elsewhere, or nowhere at all. I still don’t know which rabbit trail to follow as I don’t have a solid theory to work from over which genres or topics or styles of writing appeal to adult me in written form. Best guess is I probably still like horror like I did as a teenager, but I read synopses about someone’s broken family or blah blah murder ghost blah and I’M BORED ALREADY. I asked for horror, not Karen/Kyle Had A Feeling.

Of recent years, I’ve been liking sci-fi in movies/TV more than most things. The Myst series were already my favorite books. I went through a little “best of” phase of sci-fi books when I was in my early 20s and enjoyed them all okay. So maybe I do that and see how it goes. I read Project Hail Mary last year, and while it didn’t have my darker sensibilities due to the self-censoring narrator, it went to some places that were nice to “experience”. But even then, I didn’t keep going. I hoarded the info and nothing more.

Recently I was on social media and saw a poorly credited Ray Bradbury quote that was intent on making a statement about today, reflected from some past view. I skimmed over it, continued on with life. But the quote popped up again. It piqued my curiosity this time. What was the context, here? Why was anyone saying that at any time ever? Where’s the rest of the thought?

Soon I grabbed The Martian Chronicles and started reading.

The book is organized as short stories with an overall connecting plot. It was likely written in the later 40s and published in 1950, so it reeks of everything circa that time, with an eye on a future in space. In it, Earth is approaching its final days and is sending missions to Mars to colonize it, initially unaware that it’s already populated. Enough science has happened since 1950 to make the potential of believability go to shit (plus I’m pretty sure they could have spectrum-analyzed Mars by 1950 to know it didn’t have enough oxygen for humans to breathe), but it’s easy enough to set aside the reality of the thing and look at it like any fantasy idea, especially in contrast to what’s going on with Earth in the background.

The book touches on some heavy topics. Racism, colonization (think giving native americans smallpox blankets and “manifest destiny”), relationship abuse, nuclear war, dealing with death, and humans being fucking trash. There’s also a story transparently about hating on religious capitalism and censorship in media/art where all the censors get murdered (it’s a fun one). My brain personally lit up at the gas station story, of how simple it was, yet revealing this huge mind-bending thing. And it’s barely touched on elsewhere, and given no explanation in the first place, because fuck you that’s why. Why, why not, who cares, it happened, here’s the next thing, lol f u.

It didn’t take long into reading before I had my regularly scheduled existential crisis. This was written no later than 1950. That was 73 years ago. My oldest parent was 5 when this was published. My grandparents were collectively approximately 25. And this isn’t even original, when funneled down to ideas put into writing before. Somewhere down the line some relative was probably reading The Time Machine. Before that, I don’t have titles offhand, but I’m sure 200 or 500 years ago they had ghost stories, stories of corruption, stories about crossing into unknown places or meeting strange foreigners, stories of humanity meeting its end. Maybe they were a little simpler than Game of Thrones or The Odyssey, going much further back, but I’m sure they existed. Because that’s humans being humans, and the stories are a product of that.

I got to thinking about how we, as a species, are living a perpetual broken record. Every so many years we hit the rewind button and do the same essential shit over again, on perpetual repeat until the tape gets trapped in the VCR. The stories are essentially the same because we are what we are. People continue to be corrupt and corruptible. We were always at war with Eurasia, no wait it’s East Asia, fuck I forget which. Oh well, hit the automatic response button to fight against whatever the blurry faraway monster is this week. Might as well forget the past in favor of whatever now looks like, even if I knew the past I’d know that now is yesterday in new clothes. Be kind rewind.

The overall book is an exaggeration of a series of thoughts about war and immigration, but nevertheless hits on the sore points of how we’re mammals just doing the mammal thing trying to survive and perpetuate through the illusions of love and home.

Technically, it had good story-telling, but needed a little work in the description department and some of the characters were a little too similar to each other. It reads akin to teenage level, meaning it’s very easy to read (the short stories make it extra easy) but the content is probably a bit too much for the sensitive given the amount of death going on, so college level makes more sense, and college aged and older are more likely to be able to contextualize the setting and understand that RB was trying to make a statement about people after WWII. In short, would recommend, just not to a 12 year old or someone who can’t handle bleak content akin to Black Mirror. Genre is not hard sci fi at all, but a more floral version of sci fi mixed with western themes, horror, drama, fantasy. One story in it is only tangentially sci-fi as it takes place on Earth and sounds like a normal thing except for what’s going on in the background.

Back to the reality of my situation. Do I keep reading sci-fi? I don’t know. This is evidently a well-known “best of” book, so perhaps I lucked out and further in will just make me angry that people are boring. Perhaps it’ll be time for a detour or a new thing entirely, soon. Don’t know. Maybe it turns out I’m fine with the Sex And The City of novel-kind after all. Humans be humaning.

Venus Retrogrades

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Before I type anything else, you can see previous retrograde periods as an entire list about halfway down this page. I’m just going to reference those I’ve lived through below. Note that I use Placidus houses. If you want to play along: I have a 4 degree Libra Ascendant.

Venus goes retrograde about every other year, and it closely repeats every 8 years. I’m going to type about them all.

Aug 3, 1983 3:43 PM, Venus Rx at 9 Virgo 30
Sep 15, 1983 1:22 PM, Venus Direct at 23 Leo 12

Starts at the very very beginning of my 12th house but is otherwise in my 11th.

I was only one at this time so there’s nothing to remember. My parent’s recall of any time was spotty before they were “gone” so I don’t know what happened in that time.

Mar 13, 1985 1:17 PM, Venus Rx at 22 Aries 18
Apr 24, 1985 7:09 PM, Venus Direct at 6 Aries 00

All 7th house.

2 years old.

Oct 15, 1986 12:33 PM, Venus Rx at 20 Scorpio 24
Nov 25, 1986 9:47 PM, Venus Direct at 4 Scorpio 53

All 2nd house.

I’m 4 here, and I still don’t really remember much about this time, but it’s about when solid memories kick in for me. I don’t remember money topics during that time.

May 22, 1988 9:27 AM, Venus Rx at 0 Cancer 27
Jul 4, 1988 10:09 AM, Venus Direct at 13 Gemini 55

9th house.

This would have been the “summer” before I started 1st grade, and Venus going direct again is very close to the time I started 1st grade. I probably have an exact day around here somewhere but it was definitely just after Venus went direct. 10/12 Gemini is my Mercury/Sun, 15 Gemini is trine my Saturn. Obviously it was a change in how I saw school and felt more restrictive than kindergarten. I also thought my teacher was dull/frustrating. I found out soon into the school year that I was shuffled into some program I don’t know the details of now that had to do with me not socializing enough. My mom was also a stickler for my after-school routine, of me all but immediately doing my homework after I walked in the door, and that started this school year.

Dec 29, 1989 3:50 AM, Venus Rx at 6 Aquarius 26
Feb 8, 1990 4:16 AM, Venus Direct at 20 Cap 55

All 4th house.

There were two years in a row that my family – the whole thing – visited at some point during the holidays. I found the whole experience extremely frustrating. It was too much chaos, too much noise, too little boundaries, and whatever I needed from my home (which I guess I didn’t realize was my sanctuary of peace) wasn’t happening like normal. I also just didn’t know most of those people, and I wasn’t about it. I have a 0 degree Scorpio Moon and Venus at 0 Aquarius squared it there.

I don’t actually remember when but it was probably near then that my parents tore out/changed the carpet of the house.

Aug 1, 1991 6:35 AM, Venus Rx at 7 Virgo 19
Sep 13, 1991 4:56 AM, Venus Direct at 21 Leo 01

All 11th house.

I can guarantee that I was lonely. I’d moved six months earlier and was just floating. The people I lived with felt like strangers and aliens and I wasn’t having any luck (try super bad luck) with kids in the neighborhood. I was just existing. School started again in September, I met a new girl, and we became friends. She became my first real friend. As an extension of Leo, meaning looking at my natal Sun in 9th: one of the first things she told me was that her parents were Romanian and had brought some traditions to her family. Another six or so months later I moved again and that was that.

Mar 11, 1993 4:28 AM, Venus Rx at 20 Aries 01
Apr 22, 1993 10:14 AM, Venus Direct at 3 Aries 44

7th house besides a short bit into my 6th.

This would have been the end of 5th grade for me, so nothing partnership-related. Home life was fucking garbage during this time, just the fucking worst. School was great, but the second I was home it was like I was nothing more than a burden or nuisance to anyone. Often if anyone was home when I came home from school I’d immediately go back outside and hang out in the woods or ride my bike until dark. 3 Aries is exactly opposite my Mars. And yes. Fighting.

Oct 13, 1994 1:41 AM, Venus Rx at 18 Scorpio 01
Nov 23, 1994 11:57 AM, Venus Direct at 2 Scorpio 29

2nd house.

During this time I was dealing with my first proper crush. I liked him, he liked me, but the situation was no-go and I didn’t want to fight for it. I remember feeling super embarrassed about the whole thing because my choice wasn’t “cool” even though I felt like I came across as nerdy anyway so what did it matter whether I proved it or not. This is also when a guy at school decided he was into me, though I don’t remember exactly when that harassment started. I didn’t know it at the time but an affair was also going on in my immediate family during this time that didn’t come out as news until later.

I’m not sure what that all has to do with 2nd house, but certainly it was a busy Venus time.

May 20, 1996 2:09 AM, Venus Rx at 28 Gemini 18
Jul 2, 1996 2:51 AM, Venus Direct at 11 Gemini 47

9th house.

I turned 14 during this one, with Venus conjunct my Sun during the retrograde time. I went on vacation (a very, very long road trip of suffering) during this time. I had to speak my primary 2nd language during the whole time.

Dec 26, 1997 4:21 PM, Venus Rx at 3 Aquarius 56
Feb 5, 1998 4:26 PM, Venus Direct at 18 Cap 28

4th house.

Things were largely pretty stable at home during this time. I was doing a lot of creative and expressive projects. Unusual to other years is that I took a flower arranging class during this time period and my mom appreciated whatever projects I brought home. Going into the time I’d already decided to make a real effort to be present and social, so I was going to parties and dances and games and hanging out with whoever would have me at school. In the days leading up to Valentines Day that year I “doing the things!” took a voluntary personality test thing for a matchmaker service and the results came back with me supposedly being compatible with a kid I actually knew, who I later thought actually had a thing for me. Nothing happened on that level but he was a feature irritation at this next retrograde. During the actual time I had a bunch of fleeting crushes and there was a lot of random talk about me dating whomever, none of which happened because I wasn’t that interested in anyone.

Jul 29, 1999 9:41 PM, Venus Rx at 5 Virgo 08
Sep 10, 1999 8:24 PM, Venus Direct at 18 Leo 47

11th house.

I was god awful lonely during this one. I’d been “dating” someone and he disappeared just before Venus turned retrograde because his mom was fucking insane. I tried asking someone else out during this time and was rejected for someone else who was foreign to them in the same way I was. My closest platonic friends were both gone – across the country – during this time, too. I ended up trying to make friends with people online. Not a ton happened during the retrograde itself but I met my next future boyfriend then, and maybe also met the in-between not-really-boyfriend then as well. On return to school that year the above mentioned jackass said something shitty to me and doubled down on picking at me in a way I feel like was his frustration with me being inaccessible and nerdy rather than an eyelash-batting sort of girly girl. Could have just ignored me like everyone else, but nope.

This was also a mildly creative period of writing in a method I normally wouldn’t, and I was exploring music as much as I could with $0 and being at the mercy of whatever was popular.

Mar 8, 2001 8:07 PM, Venus Rx at 17 Aries 44
Apr 20, 2001 12:34 AM, Venus Direct at 1 Aries 28

7th house mostly but a bit of 6th.

While technically we were getting on, things were strained in the relationship I had then because we weren’t talking to each other enough (also he was lying to me but I had no clue). Things improved into the retrograde. Home life took a turn during the retrograde due to people who were feature during the 1993 one. Due related circumstances, I ended up getting the sickest I’d ever been in my life soon after Venus went direct and opposed my Mars from my 6th house. I was also sick (unrelated illness but same cause!) when Venus opposed my Mars during the initial shadow period.

Oct 10, 2002 2:35 PM, Venus Rx at 15 Scorpio 36
Nov 21, 2002 2:12 AM, Venus Direct at 0 Scorpio 03

2nd house, a sliver of my 1st.

Mostly I remember depression about the previous mentioned relationship failing. This is around when I had to ask for money for a school venture that turned out to be a waste of time. My mom (Venus conjunct my Moon) lied to my dad about it, trying to make it sound more floral and interesting than it was, even though my dad didn’t give a shit. I was also working on a independent adventure, thinking I’d make some funds designing websites for people. Turns out people only want free shit and want to steal said free shit and complain about free shit while they’re at it.

Also, my bathtub got clogged during the retrograde. If I read correctly, 11/20 is when the plumber came over to fix it. Oh, the Scorpio Moon’s bathtub clogged during Venus retrograde in Scorpio conjunct their Moon, huh? Them’s some tasty astrology right there. The bathtub there clogged more than once but I think the specific cause might have been that a razor was dropped into the drain, further adding to the hilarity (because razors are technically beauty products… aka Venus).

May 17, 2004 6:28 PM, Venus Rx at 26 Gemini 09
Jun 29, 2004 7:15 PM, Venus Direct at 9 Gemini 38

9th house.

This one started during the shadow period for me. A few days into shadow, I broke up with my boyfriend while we were supposed to be talking about traveling (Venus was conjunct my 9th house Mercury/Sun). While we broke up fairly quickly and made a solid attempt at civility, things unraveled between us over the following weeks and came to head for me near July when he told me he was getting married. Meanwhile a friend of mine got married during this time and I missed the wedding because I was given incorrect directions and traffic was so bad on the way that it wasn’t possible to make it anyway.

Also lost some packages in the mail and bought something I mysteriously still own that turned out to hold no practical value to me beyond that I thought it looked pretty.

Bonus fact that comes up several times in a row: my immediate supervisor at work decided they were going to quit and recommended me to take their place. The position promptly disappeared when they left.

Dec 24, 2005 4:36 AM, Venus Rx at 1 Aquarius 28
Feb 3, 2006 4:18 AM, Venus Direct at 16 Cap 01

4th house.

Home life was okay, pretty stable. Very close to the day Venus went retrograde I had some minor surgery (Venus square Moon?) that turned into an ordeal and I remember work on christmas doing a lot of things I normally didn’t (Moon again, it rules my 10th). Close to the time Venus retrograded I found out that my position at work was being entirely eliminated and my only choice was to take a position I’d done in the past, which I didn’t want to do again… Except for how it might bring me closer access to some boy I was interested in.

Venus retrograde was all about dealing with that boy situation and spending the whole time like “but Venus is retrograde! It’s an illusion! Do not pass go!” About February is when things really turned and by March we were talking about dating. And it was a bad choice after all, even though I think it was worth the doing.

Jul 27, 2007 1:28 PM, Venus Rx at 2 Virgo 57
Sep 8, 2007 12:14 PM, Venus Direct at 16 Leo 36

11th.

I went to a concert just before Venus went retrograde and hurt my hand. On return home I learned that, in my absence, my boss had fired the ONE employee who had as much cross-department flexibility that I did, and me – with my fucked hand – was obviously assumed to just take over. I didn’t have insurance and was never scheduled enough hours consistently to get insurance, and I thought a lot about how this environment was fucking with my future and now my health and was always fucking with my time/ability to make plans, and I decided to quit. I quit just after Venus went direct. I went to a concert a few days later and it was one of the prettiest shows I’ve ever been to.

As with the other 11th house transits, I was lonely through this time. I was mad and frustrated that I wanted to talk about a variety of topics, especially music, but all people wanted to talk to me about was boys and/or have me just sit there and listen politely like I didn’t have thoughts of my own. I am not a “girlfriend”, I have shown you many things you can pick to discuss with me that I care about, so wtf? Further, I set the landscape by offering music, and no one seemed to give a flying fuck. Basically all my friend connections felt empty. I left them behind.

Mar 6, 2009 12:17 PM, Venus Rx at 15 Aries 28
Apr 17, 2009 3:24 PM, Venus Direct at 29 Pis 12

7th into 6th.

I don’t remember much about this specific time. By comparison to previous Aries retrogrades, home was okay. I was spending a lot of time on music. A family member got married and I had to miss a show because of it. Retrospectively, I could have just gotten out of the car on the way back and gone to the show. This was around the time that my health started to turn, but specifically late February I had an issue where I missed a big deal show, and I was sick with the flu earlier in the month where I missed another show.

Oct 8, 2010 3:05 AM, Venus Rx at 13 Scorpio 14
Nov 18, 2010 4:17 PM, Venus Direct at 27 Lib 40

2nd house, late 1st.

I was sick twice during the shadow period and ended up missing a work show (that I helped curate!) because of it. Both during the shadow and during the retrograde I met or interacted with people who ended up being not good, revealed not too long after Venus went left shadow entirely. Long story short, they were more interested in creating a scene of useful clones and didn’t care for my independence. I was also feeling vaguely weird and lonely in a nondescript way through this time, but Saturn was doing stuff.

May 15, 2012 10:33 AM, Venus Rx at 23 Gemini 59
Jun 27, 2012 11:07 AM, Venus Direct at 7 Gemini 29

9th.

I don’t remember much. Safe to say I was working on tour stuff since that was my work. Otherwise I remember the time in general as me exploring bath/body products and doing self-care things I wasn’t really that interested in beforehand and not as interested in after.

After thinking about these other retrogrades in Gemini, was this the time I tried to learn Swedish? If so, that’s funny.

Dec 21, 2013 4:53 PM, Venus Rx at 28 Cap 59
Jan 31, 2014 3:49 PM, Venus Direct at 13 Cap 34

4th.

Things weren’t going too great anyway and a home situation (not mine) and lack of decent communication led to me deciding that the guy I was spending effort towards was no longer worthwhile. Venus squares my Saturn in there. I was pretty angry.

Jul 25, 2015 5:29 AM, Venus Rx at 0 Virgo 46
Sep 6, 2015 4:29 AM, Venus Direct at 14 Leo 23

11th.

Back to feeling lonely. Things at home were not good and I was trying my damnedest to save myself from homelessness while fighting a near-losing battle. I tried pulling back from social media and my efforts failed since I still had to use it for work. I was constantly frustrated that I had no friends and nowhere to go and the only person I could rely on before was losing their marbles. I got a wink-wink-nudge kind of comment from the office staff of a place I was checking in at and consequently changed a small detail that ended up landing us a home in October.

Mar 4, 2017 4:09 AM, Venus Rx at 13 Aries 09
Apr 15, 2017 6:17 AM, Venus Direct at 26 Pis 55

7th and 6th.

At the retrograde I’d just started working a new job. By the time it went direct things had revealed at home that me not being home so many hours a day was not going well because my mom’s health had gone so far south. Didn’t know details just yet and the hard part hadn’t even happened but I kept coming home to Mystery Clusterfucks and was not dealing well with having to do all at work then come home and babysit dementia, not even knowing for sure it was dementia yet. I was super anxious and not sleeping. Also, my workplace was doing renovations. Oh, and I visited a hospital at least once during this time because she was sick/had an episode.

Oct 5, 2018 3:05 PM, Venus Rx at 10 Scorpio 50
Nov 16, 2018 5:51 AM, Venus Direct at 25 Lib 15

2nd and 1st.

Basically just me being anxious about money. I ended up saying the wrong thing out loud about something I was worried about (shouldn’t have said anything) and the dementia picked it up and decided to hyperfocus. She was already anxious and weird about dumb shit, but I think it set off a period of pointless anxiety before the next thing to be pointlessly anxious about took over. Reminder that this Venus is conjunct my Moon.

May 13, 2020 2:45 AM, Venus Rx at 21 Gemini 50
Jun 25, 2020 2:48 AM, Venus Direct at 5 Gemini 20

9th.

Dementia psychosis. The end. I’ve mentioned my Sun situation multiple times, but this could be a better reflection of my Mercury. Mercury also rules my 12th house. She was just plain bonkers, 24/7 constant fucking screaming. Well, to be fair, she slept and was a bit calmer in the early day, but yeah, she started yelling and wouldn’t stop until bed. We didn’t get her medication properly adjusted until July, after we finally talked to the right person who could do it. Fuck 2020.

Dec 19, 2021 5:36 AM, Venus Rx at 26 Cap 30
Jan 29, 2022 3:46 AM, Venus Direct at 11 Cap 05

4th.

Relative peace at home again. It was quiet and not much of anything was going on. I’d felt like home was poison for a long, long while before this, and I was pointedly feeling much calmer than I had in years. I focused towards repairing and picking at rebuilding a store I’d neglected (virtually none of that came to fruition).

Jul 22, 2023 9:32 PM, Venus Rx at 28 Leo 36
Sep 3, 2023 9:20 PM, Venus Direct at 12 Leo 13

And we’re at present day, and back to the 11th house.

Unsurprisingly, I am lonely. Pretty frustrated with social media in general and really wishing the two websites in particular would just shit the bed already to force the music scene to use some other service. As it goes, I don’t know what else to do, and I need to advertise and push my wares somehow even if no one clicks shit (I can’t figure out how much I’ve been ignored and how much is social media filtering me out of relevance), so I’m stuck using it to fucking survive, or try to fucking survive.

And that’s not going well. I meant to request financial help, went to do so, but I guess I was too slow because the form didn’t give me confirmation of receipt for the 5 minutes it was open, so now I have to wait to do it again in September, after I’m once again holding an eviction notice. Yes, it does feel like an echo of 2015, except all is riding on me.

I’ve also had trouble establishing a cheaper location for my store. I went to do it and learned that I couldn’t. I’m plenty frustrated, though it’s just as well logistically because it saved me a month or two of work.

There are other things I could touch on but the larger issues are financial, home, friends, social media, and not feeling supported. I don’t see much happening over the next 2-3 weeks besides maybe getting rid of some old stuff, but after Venus goes direct, the plan is to try my hardest to get help.

These are the next few Venus retrogrades:

Mar 1, 2025 7:36 PM, Venus Rx at 10 Aries 50
Apr 12, 2025 9:02 PM, Venus Direct at 24 Pis 38

Oct 3, 2026 3:16 AM, Venus Rx at 8 Scorpio 30
Nov 13, 2026 7:27 PM, Venus Direct at 22 Lib 52

May 10, 2028 7:02 PM, Venus Rx at 19 Gemini 41
Jun 22, 2028 6:12 PM, Venus Direct at 3 Gemini 11

Dec 16, 2029 6:47 PM, Venus Rx at 24 Cap 02
Jan 26, 2030 4:32 PM, Venus Direct at 8 Cap 38

This post was long. Time for nap.

cheerleader cheerleader

escapatoria

I had “Ain’t Shit” by Doja Cat stuck in my head. I got to thinking about how it’s one of those songs you (well, I) can’t really quote, despite how it’s been a two-plus year earworm. I’m not normally one for censorship, but that song there is full of danger words. Doesn’t make it less fantastic, just… you know.

The jokes were brewing but instead I went to youtube to at least listen to the song, maybe to get it out of my head. There, I immediately noticed Awry Information. What is this? Is that a title I don’t recognize? What the frig? Am I having yet another memory lapse for not paying much attention in the first place?

It was indeed a new song, shared to the world in June, and I missed it because I’m in a stoner/doom bubble for the most part. Yay, novelty! It means a new album is coming sooner. I checked: it’s just TBA right now, suggested to potentially release this year. But the checking led right back to more novelty! Another new song! Released mere hours beforehand! Two new songs! Ah-ah-ah!

The last short bit of time (week?) has featured a bit of internet drama in relation to Doja Cat. I didn’t look it up, but I inferred that she shut some needy folks down, causing a ruckus. Doesn’t feel like something to bother myself with. But I heard about it.

Both of these songs feel like answers to the drama of the time and the past couple of years, of being a celebrity and being talked (shit) about and being expected to act like – antithesis of the lyrics – an angel all of the time, because celeb must be end-all be-all caricature of imaginary human being and never actually a human being. Be fantasy only. No real person. But she got famous while being “real” – meaning, being silly and trolling in addition to whatever else – so it doesn’t follow.

Song 1: “Attention”. I can’t pin what it is about it, but the video reminds me of Batman. Not even sure which one. Combination of black trenchcoat type jacket in a dark city maybe does it, but it’s something about the feel of the thing. The song itself is pretty chill. I can’t pin it either, but internet claims 90s vibes. The lyrics: less chill. Very “hey, I saw what you did, fuck off with that shit… dumbass” going on.

Song 2 (WOO-HOO!): “Paint The Town Red”. This one feels like a conglomeration of references. I can’t hear “bitch, I” in context of Doja Cat like that without immediately wanting to respond “I’m a cow” so I wonder if the inclusion in the song is a way to force people away from the association (or maybe what she said was that she was a cow… hmm, choices). Or we’ve all got our thing, and she says “bitch” a lot. Another apparent early reference to me is the sampled music used: “Walk On By” from 1964. One of her first big songs was “Freak” that used the 50s song sample “Put Your Head On My Shoulder”. References aside, this song is another future earworm and I found myself wanting to hear it over and over already.

Watching these back-to-back, it seems evident a third video is coming with the Carrie character.

Since I’ve been neglecting music here, let’s keep going on theme.

I went backwards in time and listened to Cocteau Twins for likely the first time ever. I’m not sure how much, if at all, I would have liked them prior to recently. Given my appreciation for Ladytron back around 2005 and 2006, maybe I’m underestimating myself. It’s not the same thing but it’s close enough. I was actually reminded of the Melvins with their bullshit attempt at lyrics and singing actual words, and that’s definitely not the same thing. But also comparable is the near-timelessness of their sound. The songs I’ve heard don’t sound like they’re 30 years old.

If this follows what happened when I decided to sample more than one Kate Bush song, guessing we’re about six months away from some huge cultural thing for Cocteau Twins. Can we do Les Rita Mitsouko next? They need to be more known in the US so I can freak out with strangers about how glitter-in-your-face awesome Catherine is.

Unless I’m having another one of those imaginary lapses, it seems I have not yet talked about the new Ashnikko music. What is this world we live! She was due to have an album out already but it seems it’s been delayed, and it’s now coming out August 25th. A few songs have already come out as videos, with “You Make Me Sick!” being an early highlight for me. Just as the habits began to prioritize elsewhere, she released “Possession of a Weapon“. The vibe of that thing is something else. Makes me think about early listening of Nine Inch Nails, when it was just Pretty Hate Machine and The Downward Spiral for me and The Fragile hadn’t yet come out, of that whole vibe of regressive-yet-progressive sexuality and enforcing personal freedom in a world that didn’t want that.

I was prepared to wait, but then here came “Cheerleader“. It’s just an audio track now, but it’s catchy enough. Pretty fair to say I’m already a fan of whatever Ashnikko’s about to release.

When do we get Ashnikko + Doja Cat songs? And they could call the song “Bitch”. heh.

And there’s also Billie Eilish, playing with her dolls:

Whoever made those little clothes of all her eras of outfits needs a raise. If you’re at all curious to have a better look, there’s a video posted right after this one showcasing them. Unfortunately, if there’s a credit, I missed it.

And that was a good song and video choice between albums, given the content. Nice way to remind folks to let go before they actually need to.

Something like two months ago I had a disco-centric moment and ended up listening to Divine’s “Native Love“. I tried the album and it gets samey after a bit, but I could totally imagine this music getting sampled the fuck out of in dance clubs in the years after. It also feels ahead of its time, like the positivity in the music reeks of Gen-Z internet shenanigans.

I wish I had that level of confidence to just fill the dead air of the music and empty stage with BEING. I’d wear the makeup and sequins no problem, as some of us know, but would need to have a giant black blanket nearby to shield myself with at all times because fuck this shit quit looking at me weirdos.

The song that got me going in that direction was actually “Every 1’s A Winner”. Another one of like, wow, dude’s very confident and just filling that stage, huh. And the german audience is like, Ich bin confusion mit dis hip shake musik.

Oh, speaking of hip shake music, I got led down a short rabbithole to Eddie Cochran’s “Somethin’ Else”. You can skip the first 17 or so seconds of this clip if you want, but hey now! I just typed about one of those other songs!

It’s hard to watch this and not think of Elvis… but I was also reminded of how much I loved the movie La Bamba when I was an infant. Imagine if he’d lived longer (either of them)… though I really hesitate to do so considering so many of his generation turned out sour. The song’s still good and makes me wish golden oldies radio would make a comeback.

Should probably point out the blatant gum commercial that is, too. When’s the last time you bought Beech Nut? Probably never, I’m guessing. And people 100 years from now will see ads and fads from 2023 and wonder why we bought into this nonsense.

Another older song that recently piqued my interest was friggin’ “M.E.” by Gary Numan. I’ve heard it before but I actually listened to the lyrics, and that’s about the loneliest song I’ve heard in some time, and then it just goes off a cliff and F.U. and your F.N. Feelings. I’m a lonely robot in a post-apocalypse wasteland and all I’ve got is this broken keyboard, so dingle dangle, bitches. *hard press of key* *sad*

One of these days I’m sure to take things more seriously.

Let’s bring it back to the heavy before I quit typing today.

The Soundgarden tribute/cover albums FINALLY came out. The stoner/heavy/doom underground all got together and made versions – some very authentic – of the band’s music. Even if you don’t care about heavy shit, if you have a spot in your brain specifically reserved for Soundgarden’s music, it’s for you.

On level with that is new Domkraft. They put out one of my favorite anythings of the past couple of years with their last album Seeds, plus the live video they did around then was great, and it feels like that happened ten minutes ago, but it’s been over two years. They’re now due to release Sonic Moons in a month. The new song feels very familiar. They have another new one – “Whispers” – that has a fresher, more wandering vibe. It’s one of those things that remind a doom fan that doom is life. You know, besides Ufomammut covering Soundgarden up there. Love how my jackass self is simultaneously posting about how great disco and pop music is in the same mood as yay the devil’s music. It’s the circle of life. Nah sah way yah.

One more. Did you know Grails has a new album coming out?! Also September. Talk about meeting somewhere in the middle. Smooth jazz 80s movie soundtrack we go! Welcome Kmart shoppers. Blue Light Special on aisle 4. Pick up a new skein of yarn for grandma and your favorite local music in the same place!

*scribbles down new business idea for later*